I just don't get it

I keep looking and looking in the mirror, but I cannot for the life of me see where the words "computer nerd" are tattooed on my forehead. Apparently, everyone else on the damn planet can read them like they're written in neon. I was outside smoking one afternoon last week when a neighbor asked if I knew anything about computers. For those of you that might have stumbled across this and don't know me from Eve, that would be like asking George W. Bush if he knows anything about hosting Ivy League keggers.

She had a computer and monitor but lacked a keyboard, mouse and power cables. Well, like most hardcore geeks I had spares. Ten minutes later I was able to set her up and start her system, only to discover that it would not boot into Windows, not even in safe mode. Worse yet, the system was running Windows Millennium Edition, the bastard child of the Microsoft family - which means there's no such thing as a command prompt in order to try and troubleshoot why it wouldn't bring up the operating system GUI. I told her I'd ask around and see if my younger brother could locate someone with a licensed copy of Windows 98 or ME that was no longer in use and fix it for her.

Sunday, she came knocking on the door. She was cleaning her closet and wanted to know if my daughter wanted any of the clothes she was going to donate to the second hand store across the highway. My daughter ended up with a whole new wardrobe, allowing me to get rid of a lot of things that were well past their prime. My brother decided that in exchange I should also install for them the CD-rewritable drive that I had just pulled from his computer and replaced with a DVD-rewritable drive in exchange for the clothes.

Monday, my brother came up with a discarded operating system and license for their computer, so I installed that and the new CD burner for the lady. She was thrilled and stayed up late playing games on the computer. Tuesday, I'm having my trying-to-wake-up cigarette and this neighbor now wants to borrow my mop, my vacuum cleaner, a pack of cigarettes and some blank CD-R media so she can try the new burner. WTF? Do I LOOK like a fucking Wal-Mart store? An hour later, her husband was having trouble loading up a game on the computer so she was back up to get me to fix that and complaining that she hated having to knock on my door because my phone was busy. Well, I keep the computer online to monitor email because I have resumes out (and I'm sure not giving her my cell number). So, fix the game install and she wants to know if I can go look to see what cable her mom's computer needs. Keep in mind that I'm still wearing the T-shirt and leggings I wear as pajamas. That's right, folks... I haven't even had time to get showered or dressed before this all starts. I ask if I can take 15 minutes to get myself together and her reply?

"Well, hurry up. My mom has to leave for work in 90 minutes."

The thing is, this isn't the first time I've run across someone that wants to be your best friend within a day or two after meeting you, then tries to borrow everything your own or use your abilities to their advantage. My best defense is the word "no", which is something that doesn't come easily to me. One thing mental health professionals warn against is social isolization but if I'm going to have to deal with people like this and have to contend with the hostility when I do get fed up and finally say no, isolation really doesn't sound like that bad an option to me.